Spicy Magnolia

San Antonio Excursion

Slowly, ever so slowly we are emerging once again from the land of germs and sickness. Is it normal for a baby to be sick every 2-3 weeks? Because that’s what it feels like we’re averaging around here ever since November. Seriously, we have one or two good weeks and then bam! The germs get the better of us. Last Friday we headed to San Antonio to spend spring break with Pops and Meems when Brennan’s fever struck again. It eventually turned into a double ear infection and some slight wheezing. He was so potent, Pops and Meems are now on antibiotics as well and Matt is down for the count also. So far, I’ve been able to withstand the nasty virus, which is a very good thing. But I tell you what, I lean towards OCD tendencies, and all these bouts of sickness aren’t helping matters. Germ-o-phobe in the making!!

In addition to being sick, Brennan also has at least 6 new teeth coming in all at the same time! I kid you not, it feels and looks like his whole bottom row of teeth (except for the three front ones he already has) are breaking through. How the little boy has been able to be as happy and energetic as he has through the past week is beyond me. I would’ve declared myself entitled to days in bed, watching movies, and used it as an excuse to do nothing. But no, his energy level grows exponentially. 

Ok, before I move onto pics from San Antonio, there are several, no, make that many things, that I could include in a Not Me! post since the first one I wrote way back when. One took place last Thursday as I was cleaning out our bathroom cabinets. I have a little boy who loves to help me. He’s meticulous about where he places things, even putting things back in the same place he found them, or finding a special new place for them. He loves to help me vacuum and use the Swiffer on the floors. He simply wants to do anything I’m doing. But cleaning out the cabinets, well, it just needed to be done by me, myself and I. So what did I do? I found the most entertaining toy to occupy the boy. If you’re a male, I’m sorry. I really am. And Matt, I’m even more sorry to you. But it worked.

From the box to the sink. From the sink to the box. It bought me a good 20 minutes.

 

Besides Brennan not feeling so hot, we had a fabulous time in San Antonio where we were spoiled with lots of yummy food, lovies, breaks from taking care of the kiddo, and great outings. Here are some snippets from our time there. By the way, I’m trying to get back into taking a photo a day for “Project Life”, but the last month of battling illnesses has put a damper on it. I think you’d get tired of me taking pictures of things like Motrin, a thermometer, a diaper of diarrhea (ew, gross!), my pockets full of dirty Kleenex, etc… Yes, I’m being dramatic. <grin>

These are the non-tampon, male-friendly pictures from San Antonio:

Brennan and I drove down Friday morning and visited Meems at her school, getting to meet her kiddos and the other teachers who couldn’t get enough of Brennan. Meems made us a special dinner that night, eggplant parmesan, which Brennan devoured. He even helped tear the lettuce leaves for the salad, which was the best tasting, most special salad I’ve ever eaten.

At the end of February, my parents celebrated 33 years of marriage. That calls for a loud WHOOP! But because of you know what…sickness…we weren’t able to go down to San Antonio to do what we originally planned to celebrate. But we got to do it this past weekend. After my momma’s art class, we set up a surprise picnic with antipasto salad goodies and The Pioneer Woman’s blueberry cobbler. It was a gorgeous day!

 

No pictures from Saturday night, but hubby and I went out on a date!! We kissed outside on some steps underneath the stars, too. It was oh-so-lovely and romantic. <grin> Did that make you turn blush red, sweetie?

Sunday, we worked in the yard and Brennan helped Pops put rocks in a bucket that Pops and Meems are using to create a play space for Brennan in the backyard.

Monday, Meems took me and Brennan to the Witte Museum where they had an awesome dinosaur display on exhibit. Brennan was completely fascinated with the huge creatures that moved and made noise. At times, he just wanted to sit on the ground and stare. We also visited other parts of the museum that displayed the vast wildlife of Texas from snakes, to bears, to bison to birds. It was incredible.

  Sitting near a huge dinosaur print

 

Tuesday, we stayed home and snuggled because it was cooler and rainy, and it was obvious the boy wasn’t feeling too great. But he still was a happy camper who was absolutely enthralled with all of the puppies, throwing the ball constantly for Dapples, chasing Seymour, and patting Miss Elbee.

 

He also had a knack for putting things in special places. I’m sure Meems is still discovering his hiding places for remotes and hand cream.

Wednesday was our last full day in San Antonio. We played at an elementary school playground and then, based upon how the boy seemed, decided to take him to an urgent care facility. Since it was our last outing, we wanted to make it fun so we ate lunch at Grimaldi’s. Yum, Yum, Yum! The boy loves sausage pizza, so he had his own personal pizza and got his belly nice and full. We really were amazed at what a cute, good natured date he was despite a double ear infection!

We’re sorry that Pops and Meems are now sick, but we’re so grateful for all the lovies! Our time together was the perfect way to usher in spring, and we can’t wait to spend more time with them this summer!

Hoping ya’ll are nice and healthy and get to enjoy a special weekend with your loved ones!

A Texas Winter Wonderland (of Sorts)

Girls in white dresses and blue satin sashes; snow flakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes…These are a few of my favorite things.

Oh yes, friends, for all you in the frozen tundra up north who are aching for spring, this southern girl prayed for a long, cold winter, the coldest we’ve seen in years. Well, ladies and gents, I’ve been blessed; it’s been a nice, long winter and God gave me one more winter gift: snow! Fluffy, gloriously large flakes of white softness fell from the sky off and on during the day. It was a day to sit in wonder, staring out the window in silent awe. It was also a day to go outside and play, to introduce Brennan to the phenomenal white stuff that graces these parts once in a blue moon.

We didn’t stay outside too long because after recuperating from last week’s viruses, little Brennan woke up with a fever that reached to nearly 102 degrees. So back to the doctor we went. It’s been a good 9 years since I’ve driven in snow living in Chicago. But it wasn’t that bad, and the doc confirmed that he picked up a new virus. So we’re staying put for a couple of days. Before I get to the pictures, I wanted to mention that for at least the next few weeks, I’m taking a break from reading other people’s blogs. Hence, no comments on your blogs. But maybe I’ll catch you on Twitter or Facebook, or better yet, face-to-face!

Take in the beauty, or if you’re sick of snow, just amuse me for awhile <grin>:

Everyone in town was probably sitting on pins and needles waiting to know if school and work were going to be canceled. Matt kept refreshing his work email every five minutes to no avail. We waved goodbye to our special man, who was at least able to see the flakes through his office window (which he didn’t have for many years at his other job).

 

 

A Texas Winter Wonderland

 

 

Kids aren’t the only ones who like the snow. Big, furry Labrador Retrievers like it, too. Eventually, her muzzle wasn’t the only thing white on her.

 

 

Here’s a boy who doesn’t feel well and is ready for a nap. A boy who was happiest today in my lap reading books.

 

 

When Daddy wrapped up work, he couldn’t resist bundling up his boy to make Brennan’s first snowman. Evan, our 3 year old neighbor buddy made the cutest snowman you can see in the left-hand corner.

 

 

It’s February. And there is snow on the ground. There is something seriously wrong with this picture.

 

 

Brennan’s first snow/grass man! Isn’t it handsome!? Brina is a little girl who lives across the street. She loves to come over and play with Brennan and Molly when we’re out front. She made the head. Unlike Evan’s complete snowman, ours lacks eyes. And a nose. And arms.

 

 

 

I’m actually not quite sure who the boys are, but these three kiddos made this snowman on the other side of our yard that got a decent amount of the white stuff. So we have three awesome snowmen in our near vicinity that make us smile. They won’t last as long as Kelly’s snowman though, no sir-ee. We will bid farewell to them tomorrow.

 

 

Getting warm by the fire. After his bath, this is what the scene looked like again in our house except that I was holding Brennan and all the lights were off so he could fall asleep while we said his bedtime prayers, thanking God for the snow! What a delightful day, even with a sick lad.

 

Now that we’ve had a solid winter, complete with snowflakes that stayed on my nose and eyelashes, the silver white winter is welcome to melt into spring.

 

Gross and Pathetic, but (hopefully) Funny

Hello, dear Internet peeps! What plans do you have for today?

Can you guess what ours are? 

If you guessed that we’re headed out of town for a family getaway, you guessed wrong. If you think we’re gonna clean house again like we did last week, you’re out of your ever lovin’ mind (Beth Moore used that phrase in a chapter I just read in So Long, Insecurity, and I wanted to use it <grin>). If you guessed we’re packing boxes to move to Colorado like I’d mentioned a few posts back. Well…you’re wrong. <grin> Running a marathon? Hardly. Seeing a movie? We’d need a babysitter. Any volunteers?

Have you guessed it yet?

We’re staying home and doing nothin’! Nothin’! It may or may not include us staying in our PJs all day. It probably will. It may mean getting outside to work in the yard a bit. Only if the sun comes out, which is unlikely. It definitely includes watching some Olympics. And it may or may not include me indulging in some breakfast burritos from Chick-fil-A. It will. It most certainly will, since my hubby and Brennan just left on a “man run” to bless their girl with her most favorite treat on the planet right now!

All three of us have been down-and-out with sickness this week. We sound pathetic, ya’ll. We look pathetic. We are pathetic. I’ve never seen so much nose goobers in all my life. And I’ve never had to touch someone else’s nose goobers until Brennan; I’ve wiped away more of his goobers than I’d like to admit, using my own hands so my boy didn’t look quite as pathetic as he would with nose goobers dripping down from his nostrils. My clothes had spots on them where I could point out to you the places where Brennan left his mark with either nose goobers or drool, or where I simply took the nose goobers from Brennan and wiped them on my pants. Pathetic, I tell ya! I won’t even go into telling you about the time that I was too lazy to get a Kleenex and had to be creative with my own goobers. Brennan seriously looked at me with disgust and confusion. Why is Momma doing that with her hands? No, Momma, no! That’s just wrong, Momma! Please, no!

I’m trying to be super good with our budget this year. Cleaning and supplies is one category I always get in trouble with (figuratively, not literally). I’d reached our max for the month a couple of weeks ago and I’ve been dead-set on not going over, even if it meant telling Matt we’re rationing out toilet paper and Kleenex for the duration of February. I think we’re gonna be ok on the TP, but Matt drew the line with the Kleenex after spending a day blowing his nose with paper towel that felt like sand paper. While we’ve probably used a whole tree’s worth of tissue this week, our noses are ever grateful.

My friend Jill was brave enough to send her Haddie-belle over here for a few hours to play on Thursday, more out of necessity than anything else that particular day. Bless little Haddie’s heart. That’s when, in a span of 7 minutes, Haddie was witness to Brennan slipping and sliding in the greasy oil pan for the car in the garage; and as I was stripping him down to his diaper before going inside, I noticed he had a nasty dirty diaper that needed immediate changing because the nastiness was in places it shouldn’t have been; and while changing said diaper, Molly proceeded to throw up--twice. It was a beeeautiful day, peeps. I’m tellin’ ya. Haddie was the bright spot of the day, that precious one was.

Yesterday, Brennan went to play with Harrison and Haddie while I took Molly to the vet. The vet that is 45 minutes from our house. The vet that we’ve used since we were given Molly when she was two (she’s now 8.5). The vet that I can’t bring myself to stop going to because she knows Molly and her history so well. The vet that I call to have them mail more of Moos’ meds to us because it’s easier than making the 1.5 hour drive. The vet that seemingly prefers animals over children, hence one of the reasons I left Brennan at Jill’s. The vet who thinks, “Yeah, right this lady watches her dog like a hawk to make sure she doesn’t get any people food dropped by the baby.” I do, lady, I do! It’s exasperating, but I do! The vet who has such an effect on me as to draw out my chronic self-consciousness (aka insecurity) that I’m quaking in my tennies wondering if she thinks I still love and take good care of Molly, since I now have a human baby. Ya’ll, it’s pathetic.

After the vet, Molly and I scurried across town to pick up Brennan and then take him to his doctor’s appointment. I wanted to be sure he didn’t have an ear infection or somethin’ before heading into the weekend, because that would make us more pathetic. More miserable than anything else, I guess. We pulled into the parking lot where I almost ran over a UPS driver coming around the front of his big ol’ truck. He told me in so many words that it was a job hazard. I left Molly in the car since it was cool enough, and Brennan and I made our way into the doctor’s office. No ear infection for the boy, but I had my first dreadful introduction to the nebulizer to treat Brennan’s wheezing.

I know this is nothing new and no big deal, but for a first-time Momma going through it, having no idea what to expect, it was not fun. Brennan didn’t think it was fun either. My momma and another friend of mine are so good at being patient advocates and discerning if and when a medical treatment, and how they administer the treatment, is best for the patient. I have no clue. And it sends my blood pressure rising. So when my boy is screaming his head off while I’m trying to hold an oxygen mask to his face, the only thing going through my mind is: Does he have to do this? Should I tell them we’re not continuing with this treatment? Of course, they tell me, “Yes, he does need this.” But I had no clue what we were getting into. I finally had the forethought to start singing and that calmed him down, thankfully. The treatment didn’t help his wheezing, however. So we’re keeping a close eye on him this weekend to make sure it doesn’t get worse. And nurse Meghan knows exactly how to tell he’s wheezing when the doctor could only tell by using a stethoscope. Yeah, right.

By that time it was nearly 3 p.m. and I hadn’t eaten since breakfast. Wanna guess what place I hit? Yep, Chick-fil-A. I was starving. And well, I’m Meghan. And I look to food for comfort. I need to tell my South Beach Mama friends that this week was a bad week for me to start up a new plan. The rest of the afternoon, we hunkered down, snuggled, and read books. And I fed my hubby cereal for dinner. I’m such a prize, folks.

And that, dear friends, is why we’re gonna do absolutely nothin’ today. Not that we need a reason. But plenty are oozing around here.

Project Life: February 9-15, 2010

What a fun-filled week it was! It was a whirlwind and all the days seem to blend together, but these pictures will hopefully trigger at least some semblance of memory.

 

Tuesday, February 9

Brennan’s love for Molly keeps growing and growing! She’s his little playmate. He’s learning how to play tug of war with Molly’s pull-ball.

 

Wednesday, February 10

We went to a special four year old’s, Harrison’s, birthday party at Chuck E Cheese! It was Brennan’s first time there and he was on stimulation overload! He was also afraid of the big mouse, as you can tell from how tightly he’s grabbing hold of my shirt. Harrison is such a big boy now! He stopped using his paci and as a special moment to commemorate this right of passage, he gift-wrapped his paci and gave it to Brennan, wanting to pass it along to Brennan until he gets big. Harrison knows how much Brennan loves his paci. <grin> It was so precious! And way to go H!!

 

Thursday, February 11

It was cold and rainy all last week, so we did a lot of things indoors. Over the past week, Brennan has become infatuated with reading and books! He comes to us regularly with a book in hand, ready to crawl in our laps to read, and it’s so fun! So I decided it was time we hit the library. Plus, I wanted to check out some of the books my friend, Emily, recommended after she read my last Project Life post. While I tried to focus on finding certain books to check out for him, I had a little boy who was more interested in exploring. I was out of breath by the time we left that place; I couldn’t keep up with him fast enough! He was most fascinated with the children’s computers and played a coloring game on one for awhile.

Austin was nearly one of the only cities, so it seemed, that didn’t get any snow in last week’s Snowmegeddon. We were pretty sad about that. Matt’s folks sure got enough for all of us though. Nana got creative with her snowmen, making two snow grandsons (Brennan is the one with the blue eyes) that she sent a picture of. You can tell she’s grandson deprived! <grin>

 

 

Friday, January February 12

This was a special, special day. On Thursday, Brennan initiated feeding himself his oatmeal with a spoon. It was messy and thrilling and exciting and sticky. So we captured a photo of it on Friday. Notice how close my hands are to alleviate any unnecessary messes. <grin>

Brennan and I met up with Pops and Meems and our life-long, dear family friends, Ron and Tycha, at Panera’s. My folks came up for the night to be with Ron and Tycha who were in town visiting family. And Brennan and I were blessed to join them for the morning. Brennan was quickly declared their adopted grandson, and I couldn’t be more delighted! Tycha has battled breast cancer over the last few years, and Ron is currently battling an inoperable lung cancer. Their zest for life has always been an inspiration, and all the more so now. Their attitude and outlook is amazing, and a true example to me. I cherished the moment when Ron walked me and Brennan to the car, and as he shielded Brennan from the brisk, cold wind, he loved and kissed on him so tenderly. Ron stayed with me the entire time I loaded Brennan, and I will treasure that moment all my life. Brennan and I then had lunch with Pops and Meems at Chick-fil-A. It was Pops and Meems’ first time seeing Brennan walk, and I think Pops was worn out!

On Friday night, we joined Chris and Jill, Jillie’s folks, and Harrison and Haddie for an Olympic celebration dinner complete with Canadian bacon/pineapple pizza, salad, and amazing fondue (cheese and chocolate). We took Brennan’s pack n’ play to put him down so we can party as late as we want. I fell asleep around 9:30, however. What can I say? Every party needs a pooper.

 

Saturday, January February 13

All week long I’d been trying to make head-way cleaning this house from top to bottom, a thorough spring cleaning of sorts that was badly needed. Trust me, I had at least 12 filthy rags to prove it was needed! Brennan’s naps weren’t that great and I could only get so much done when he was awake. So Matt was kind enough to take care of him all day on Saturday so I could finish cleaning. I kid you not, I worked from 9:30 a.m.-6:30 p.m. cleaning this place. I crashed! And felt completely satisfied afterward. <grin> The last time I’d cleaned like that, Brennan was not mobile. Mobility makes a big difference, ya’ll! Anyway, Matt took Brennan to a little play area in the mall that I go to sometimes. It was Matt’s first time there and he got to see Brennan in action. The boys loved their day together!

 

 

Sunday, January February 14

He loves his books! This is a regular sight in our home these days.

Monday, January February 15

Matt and I like to go to dinner to celebrate Valentine’s Day on any other day besides the holiday itself; restaurants are too crowded. Matt surprised me and made reservations at the Eastside Cafe and lined up our babysitter for a wonderful evening out. The food was awesome! If you’re in Austin, I highly recommend a visit. Their garden, where they grow most of their own produce, was incredible! And Matt was such good company, you’d never have known he didn’t feel well. I delved into this Ghirardelli brownie for dessert, my last one for a good long while. It’s a must. An absolute must to both eat this brownie sometime and for me not to eat such an indulgence for awhile. The irony! The painful irony that I need to settle on the latter.

I have two sick boys on my hands, so I must tend to them. Hope ya’ll have a great week!

Antics of a Big Boy

My momma is waaayyyy behind in updating you about my latest antics. She had a full plate in January and didn’t get to write about what I’ve been up to since I turned 11 months old, and now I’m only 2 days shy of turning 13 months. She’s got lots to write about ‘cause I’ve been up to lots. Folks, I have my momma on her toes! It’s funny to see her run after me. I think she’s silly. So since Momma hasn’t written, I thought I’d give you the low-down on the big stuff I’ve been up to and what I’ve been learning since I was eleven months. ‘Cause I’m a big boy now, ya know?!

i love reading bos (momma calls them books). love, love, love!

da is my bestest buddy (that would be the dog).

i cry when da da leaves for work to bring home the bacons.

mama, mama is my back up word for everything.

wa do gets my food taken away (all done). i even help pick up the food on my tray to put it on the plate, as well as my sippy cups ‘cause they fit on my plate, too.

it’s fun to put items from the big basket onto the moving belt at the grocery store. i impressed momma one day when i did that.

i know how to sign “toys away” and the big people cheer for me when i put them away, so i do.

i like helping close doors.

sometimes i sign “please” and “thank you”. and when i feel like it, i actually try saying it. momma is always saying those words. she sounds like a parrot.

i astound mommy with my energy level.

i got nine tooths now.

couple weeks ago, momma enjoyed holding me for each of my afternoon naps. i loved it. now i want her for every afternoon nap. she’s trying hard to fix that though. poor me.

but momma’s blessed: i still take two naps! she thinks they could be longer though because i like rising when the rooster crows after sleeping 10 hours.

stacking blocks is fun. knocking them down is even funner.

bananas are still my favorite, and i can throw down some food. mommy and daddy call me a “trooper” or a “jewel” because i’m good to take out to eat. since walking, sometimes when i’m done though, i’m done. Done.

i is a walking machine. forget crawling. crawling is for babies. i’m a big boy.

i’m learning how to obey daddy and mommy. i’ve learned pretty well “no touch”.

sharing food with ma is fun (molly).

i think bigger kids than me rock! i greet other kids with a pat and a smile.

give me time in a new place to feel safe. then, i’m a full-blown ham.

chase is my favorite game. at the park, i like the slide and swings.

momma says i pick up on things quick. i’m a quick boy on my feet, too.

if you want a kiss, ask for it, and i’ll give it. open mouthed.

riding in the car face forward is awesome!

i got some cool noise tricks with my tongue. i’ll show you sometime.

i’m a music man.

i may not say them yet, but i know lots of words and know when it’s time for things, like lunch.

four. four hair trims since i was born. and about to have another one. momma tells me that God knows how many hairs are on my head. lots! and lots!

i is a sweet boy. i love lovies.

monkey, sugar bear, angel boy, cotton-headed ninny mungin are my nicknames.

i no longer get a bottle at night. mommy can’t bear to stop giving me a morning one. soon, but not yet.

sometimes i think whining or screaming will help me get my way. the big people are out to prove me wrong.

i think da da is the coolest and run to him first thing when he gets home. momma tries not to be jealous.

momma is silly. she dances, sings in the car, she tries so hard to make me laugh. we have some special times laughing, like when i try picking her nose when she’s rocking me. that makes us laugh.

i pick up sticks at the park just to give to molly.

my most favorite times are when all of us are playing on the floor together: da da, ma ma, ma, and me

 

Momma loves you, oh, what does she call you? Oh ya, Internet peeps. She loves ya lots. Which makes me love you, too. Happy Valentine’s Day. We send hugs. And I send open-mouthed kisses. <grin>

Project Life Tuesday: February 2-8, 2010

I recently told you about Becky Higgins’ Project Life Kit that I started for 2010, and it’s been a lot of fun, and so much simpler than the traditional scrapbooking I was doing before. I’m trying to snap a photo a day after for my album, and thought it would be fun to join The Mom Creative’s weekly Project Life Tuesday. So here are the photos from the past week:

 

Tuesday, February 2nd

Fridge Art from our weekend with Eric and Kim. The Mexican food restaurant, Chuys, rocks. ROCKS! (Marla, if you’re ever in Austin, me taking you to Chuy’s is a must. It beats out Chipotle and Freebirds, hands down. And I love Freebirds, which means that Chuy’s simply rocks!)  And “Burn” is a phrase Eric and Kim’s small group in CO uses a lot as a “na na na na boo boo” kinda thing. And because Matt and I are such cool people (ahem!), we were taught its meaning. I used it every chance I got, whether or not it was the proper intended use of it. So there: burn.

 

 

Wednesday, February 3rd

Playing with the pots and pans while I fixed dinner. He’s my little chef who loves to be in the kitchen with me rummaging through the pantry or mixing things with the wooden spoon. He baked some amazing chicken pot pie that night!

 

 

Thursday, February 4th

While Matt is not a coffee drinker, his daily energy buzz is hot chai. He’s holding off buying some from Sam’s to help our budget a bit, but I had some spare change to swing by Starbucks last Thursday and pick up a chai latte for our special hubby/daddy. We surprised him and swung by his office to drop it off before I took Brennan to get his first pair of real tennis shoes. The blurry writing on the lid is a love note, so it’s ok if it’s blurry and you can’t see it clearly. <grin>

 

 

Friday, February 5th

The big boy in his new shoesies! By the way, the boy is going to be severely made fun of because he’s learning all the nouns that I put “y” or “ies” on the end (i.e. doggies, horsey, shoesies, sockies). We went to Sandy’s Shoes and found out that Brennan has a large foot for his age, which should come as no surprise. He’s a size 6, and the gentleman that helped us was amazed at how good he was at walking having just taken off a week ago. Although, he might just tell all his toddler customers that. So far, the shoesies stay on better than his sockies.

 

 

Saturday, February 6th

What a cute little hiney! Ever since Brennan was born, after Brennan’s bath, Matt would bring him to me all wet, wrapped up in his towel to give me kisses. The fresh, clean baby smell is totally irresistible and I’d nestle into Brennan’s cheeks while Matt held him all bundled up. But this weekend, surprise, surprise! Matt sent the character out me walking, buck n*aked! It was hilarious! And there’s something about being in only a diaper or completely n*aked that Brennan absolutely loves. He giggles, he’s frisky, he’s foot loose and fancy free! I hope we don’t have a future streaker on our hands. And don’t worry, I’m still nestling into his proper cheeks. Ok, bad, bad joke, I know! <grin>

 

 

And for kicks, one more picture for Saturday:

My tennis shoe lovin’, jean wearin’, casual hubby decided on his own, that he wasn’t going to get tennis shoes to replace his worn out pair. Instead, he opted for these brown shoes. Ya’ll, this is big. This is huge! I promise with everything in me that I have never mentioned to him how cool I think it would be if he wore something like these over tennis shoes as his every day shoe. Not once. So when we were at the outlet mall a month ago and he said he was thinking about brown shoes, I was stunned. And when we were actually ready to buy a pair this weekend, with no prompting from me (and he can attest to this), he chose these. I was flabbergasted and excited and swooning! I’d still love him in his old tennies, but folks, the southern belle in me is lovin’ these handsome loafers.

 

 

Sunday, February 7th

Super Bowl Sunday with my boys.

 

 

Monday, February 8th

Five months have passed since I dusted our bookshelves, so I think it’s about time I get out the trusty dust rag and Pledge, don’t ya think? It was another rough Monday for me and Brennan. So much so that I spent more time than I would have liked going through Antique Mommy’s and Amanda’s archives for any glimmer of hope from posts they may have written about their experiences with their toddlers. Brennan isn’t a monster, please don’t get me wrong. He’s far from it. But my type-A, need-to-have-a-plan kinda personality really clashes with how parenting is constantly changing and full of so many unknowns. I know I’m not the first one to say it, but if only God gave personalized instruction manuals when a child was born, the world would be a better place. Or at least I’d be a better mommy. Someone, just tell me what to do and I’ll do it. Steps 1, 2 and 3!

I also am deeply battling insecurity and a raging desire to be more than just a mommy, both of which are gnawing at me incessantly, so bring on the guilt as well. It’s no coincidence that I’m reading Search for Significance for a women’s Bible study at church and Beth Moore’s book, So Long Insecurity, which I can’t put down. But at the same time, I don’t want to read another word because it’s too much to take in all at one time it’s hittin’ so deep. I’m not looking for comment affirmation here, just sharing for a moment. And now I’m feeling insecure about writing that last sentence. Should I have or shouldn’t I have? Oh, Lord, rid me of this malady if it kills me!

As I was dusting the bookshelves, I came to the shelf that has these two giraffes and next to them a book called Tall Blondes. While I was in Africa, I fell in love with giraffes. Their grace and gentleness, their strength and their beauty. I brought home these two wooden giraffes not only to remember this magnificent creature that graces the vast expanse of Africa, but even more so because of their stance: a baby giraffe stretching her neck as much as she can to gaze into the eyes of the larger giraffe whom she knows protects her, cares for her, and loves her more than she could possibly fathom. These giraffes symbolize my time in Africa where my eyes were fixed upon Jesus in a loving gaze that nothing could take my eyes off Him, a real mark in my life with Him. They are a tangible reminder to me of where my eyes always need to be.

And the book? Given to me by Gaga, my grandmother, who knew of my love for giraffes as a going away gift when I left for college. In it is a note penned with her chicken scratch saying how much she’d miss me and pray for me when she talked to God. Oh, I miss her so.

These giraffes are for a day like yesterday, when I need to remember not only how my eyes should be fixed upon Jesus who alone satisfies all of my needs and knows the deepest longings of my heart, but also how His eyes are on me. I cannot flee from His presence and nothing can separate me from His love. Even in my weakness, my mixed up priorities, my lack of knowledge of how to be a mommy, or my raging emotions and insecurity, nothing can separate me from His love, from His constant gaze upon me. I just need to keep my fixed, intent look upon Him.

A Paper Lover in a Digital World

A few years ago when I was putting together ice-breaker questions for a small group of college gals, I came across the question, “If you found $100 in a store, what would you do with it?” I happened to be the lucky one who drew that question out of the hat and enthusiastically shared that I would spend it in a stationery store, proceeding to tell these girls who had just met me about my love for all things paper. Silence. And bewildered looks were on their faces. How come the conversation quickly halted? Then one of the girls boldly asked, “You wouldn’t take it to the cashier and said you found lost money?” Huh? Thoughts of how their discipleship leader just admitted she wouldn’t care one hoot or try in the least to find the rightful owner of a large sum of money probably quickly turned into, “Why did I have to get stuck with this girl for a leader?” My face flushed bright red having realized my cockeyed, yet innocent, answer. I laughed at myself, trying to regain composure and redeem the first impression that I just blew through an ice-breaker question. I thought it would be eye-opening to see what a person would spend $100 on. Who knows what those girls got out of that evening, but they undoubtedly knew I was a lover of paper, with a level of integrity yet to be determined.

But we live in a digital world. Everything is stored on the computer, which is wonderfully convenient. But this girl has to have something tangible, something to hold onto that is a physical document to touch, to pass down to the next generation. Because all of the pictures and blogs just don’t seem real otherwise. Anybody gettin’ what I’m sayin’? For awhile, scrapbooking was a main hobby of mine. Forget $100; I’ve probably spent at least $800 over the past seven years of scrapping. Once I completed Brennan’s baby book documenting my pregnancy through the main events of his first year, however, the srappin’, at least in a traditional sense, was a thing of the past. Don’t feel badly for the child. He is going to probably know more about his childhood than he ever hoped. Since his birth, I’ve completed a book called Love Letters to My Baby, which was a guided journal for thoughts from the beginning of pregnancy to a few months after birth. If we have a second child, I’ll want to get another copy; I loved that book. Then I kept a “Baby’s First Year Calendar” which marked all of his firsts, growth developments, special events, and daily happenings I wanted to record. I cropped my favorite pictures and had a collage for each month. Thirdly, I write briefly in a daily journal about my favorite moments of the day, what we did, or what I saw him do that was exciting. I even have the gumption of writing about the awful days, like this past Monday and Tuesday which led me to write, “If we have a second child…” just a few sentences above. Where has my sweet, sweet baby gone? He has morphed into a toddler. Granted, he’s been feeling awful, which doesn’t help matters. But since turning one, he is a new child. Oh, he’s still the sweetest thing on earth to me, but the jury is still out as to whether I like this new stage. I digress. Finally, there is the blog, where I record more than some readers would like to know.

Like I said, the boy is not short of journals, pictures and documentation about his childhood. I realize I went overboard. Way overboard! Please know it’s more about my abnormal compulsion for all things paper, and a deep-down desire to want future generations to know about our life, and well, a love for writing. And the four-fold documenting will not likely be repeated for the second child (if there is one) <grin>.

The thought of even the blog remaining in the nebulous place of cyberspace is unsettling to me though. If anything ever happened to it, I’d be heartbroken since it has, more or less, become my journal and scrapbook. At least the main one. <grin> So I turn it into a book! I know, I am crazy. That’s the “scrapbook project of sorts” I worked on in Houston during my down time. You may have heard of the program: Blurb. It has its idiosyncrasies and major bug issues that are nothing short of frustrating, at least for a Typepad user. It took me eight hours to fine-tune my blog imports from July-December, staying up till 1 a.m. I know, I know. I sure hope they improve it. But it’s the only software I know that I can use to turn the blog into a tangible book to take up more room on the book shelf. If anyone knows of something else I could use, by all means, let me know.

And as for my pictures, I still have the itch to have something for pictures all on their own, but traditional scrapbooking takes too much time. I’m so excited about something I came across recently through The Mom Creative: Project Life. Designed by Becky Higgins, her words describe it the best: “it’s a way to capture your memories in a format that is simple, pre-designed, and ready for you to add your personal photos and stories.” I’m trying it for the first time this year, and after receiving the kit in the mail this week, I am in love! I can still be creative, but it’s pre-designed in such a way that I am not drained by trying to think of something creative to do for each page, like traditional scrapping. For those that like to put pictures in an album, it’s basically that but with the option to add journaling cards and the provision to make it colorful and pretty. There are all sorts of ways you can use it. It’s a great deal, too! It only costs $40; that leaves me with $60 to spare after finding someone else’s money in a store!

The kit allows enough space in its page protectors to take a picture a day, and that’s what I’m trying to do. I haven’t succeeded in that yet, but I’ve already enjoyed the fruit of having it in my mind to grab a picture a day; it causes me to have my eyes opened more to the special, even subtle events of the day I’d like to remember. One problem I may run into, however, is deciding which picture of the day to choose, like yesterday’s options:

Brennan learning to brush his teeth

 

or Brennan’s first bubble bath

Which do you think?

Seeing as how Monday and Tuesday made me want to cry at the end of the day and bury my head in the sand, I might just end up using both of these pictures because I was in survival mode and forgot about the camera. Yesterday was better though. The little fella even crawled over a ways to me to give me a kiss because Momma asked for one. And that will be the favorite moment of the day to write about in my tangible journal.

The Miracle of the Moment

What are the significant moments in your life that you mark with anniversaries, the ones where you say, “Five years ago today, I was ______”? It probably goes without saying that this past week and the coming days have sparked many memories of this time last year. It’s so nostalgic. And emotional. And wonderful.

For the past year, I’ve studied Beth Moore’s, Esther: It’s Tough Being a Woman. I just wrapped it up this week. Not sure if you caught that: it’s taken me a full year. Yep, that’s right. It’s taken me 52 weeks to complete a 9 week course! I started it the morning of January 15, 2009. While listening to the first CD session, I was slightly distracted by the onset of contractions. Well, at least I found out they were contractions the next day when my doctor hooked me up to a fetal monitor and saw that why, yes, I indeed was in labor, and thus he sent me over to the hospital.

While listening to the CD, I kept time of the contractions as you can see on the picture below with the scribbled note, “Today, can I agree it’s tough being a woman? If labor counts, yes! <grin> 1/15/09”. And as noted, those contractions were fairly regular. That was at 9:06 a.m. on January 15th. My little boy came into the world the following day at 6:47 p.m.

 

Fast forward to January 13, 2010, a year later. My book isn’t as new and fresh anymore. Some of the pages are torn and manhandled from leaving it in easily accessible places to a very curious child. As I concluded this study with tears stinging my eyes, I held a little blonde-haired, blue-eyed boy in my lap who was eager to see what his momma was working on. That little boy keeps getting bigger and bigger, right before my very eyes. He’s so big he can hold a pen in his tiny hands and scribble, fascinated by the markings resulting from his hand movements.

This study, while it took me forever and a day, I believe was one that the Lord purposefully intended for me to delve into the past year. With every turn of the page, it seemed like each lesson was perfectly timed. I absolutely loved this study! It was thrilling and exuberant and gripping. Full of richness and Truth that I had not encountered in previous readings of Esther. The Lord used this study to shed light on things I am afraid of, the things I think I’m trusting Him with, but in reality, it’s only because I hope with all my might that that will somehow help me avoid experiencing the things I’m most afraid of. But that’s not really trusting Him, is it? Like Esther, I want to be able to say, “If I perish, I perish”. That no matter what may come my way, I trust Him, because no matter what circumstances I may walk through, God will always be there. He will help me get through. He will fulfill His purposes. He will take care of my family. He will comfort me.

This year has been a defining year for me. A battle raged in me for years about whether I wanted to be a mommy. But in His divine purpose for me, He has blessed me with that role this past year. Oh, it’s sure had its challenges. And it’s had its amazing benefits that far outweigh those challenges. However, a new battle rages in me for the desire to feel more significant than “just” being a mommy, the desire for fame or to be well-known in the blogosphere, to feel like I’m achieving a greater purpose in life than being a stay-at-home momma. I try to talk down to those lies almost on a daily basis. Because the truth is, as something I’ve revisited through Esther, is that I am significant. Jesus Christ gives me purpose and meaning. He is writing my story and it will have a good ending. That for such a time as this, I was chosen to be a wife and a mommy, to serve my precious family in joy, even in the most mundane and ordinary of events like scrubbing toilets and changing diapers. That for such a time as this, I was set apart to be an example to my son of His greatness and glory, to acknowledge that ultimately, this past year has been more about Him and His faithfulness and grace to a girl who didn’t have a clue about anything baby related than my own hookups and insecurities. He shined this past year!

And so this Saturday, when we have a few people over to celebrate Brennan’s first birthday, Jesus will be the honored guest. Oh, how I praise Him and acknowledge that He carried me through a year of so many unknowns that I could have easily sunk. I’m so grateful that He kept me, just like He said He would.

I just might frame those two pictures above. They represent a year filled with defining moments. Moments that if I was too flippant, I’d dismiss as ordinary or insignificant. But no, they’re miraculous.

Let the Parties Begin

No sooner were the holiday festivities drawn to a close than the next set of parties began…and the biggest ones are yet to come! We just wrapped up an extended weekend with Matt’s cousin, Jason, and his new fiancée, Ellen. Avid foodies, they were the most fun to take through the “mecca of Whole Foods”. Little did I know that place sells $1500 bottles of wine, Portruse (spelling??) to be exact. Jason enlightened me. And if anyone has a chunk of change to drop, he’d like one as a wedding present. Brennan enjoyed a private violin concert, in which Molly thought she would make it sound more beautiful if she barked. It did not make it more beautiful.

The little Texan also made his debut at our State’s Capitol, completely fascinated by the echo resounding from his voice while crawling through its hallways.

We ventured across the city, pointing out its unique highlights, all the while celebrating the special couple…

And eating out at some of our favorites like Z’Tejas and Mighty Fine Burgers, and of course, splurging on homemade food like this Gingerbread Tumble.

It was the first party of the New Year, and there are at least three more this month, beginning with a BIG ONE! Yep, bring out the party hats and the box of Kleenex, because my baby boy is turning one year old on Saturday! It’s already been an emotional week, but a thrilling one as well. Just look at where we’ve come over the past year:

This past weekend marked the first out of three weekends this month of hosting company. I am also going on my own little getaway by myself in south Texas, and I’m quite excited about it. So I will likely be M.I.A. running our bed and breakfast the next few weeks for some of the most superb people in all the world. And partying. And soaking up the last few moments before my baby enters toddlerhood. It’s definitely been a year worth partying!

I’ll Never Be the Same Again

Describing myself as a baby person, I would not. I was nowhere in the same arena of passion for kids and babysitting as our lovely sitter who sweetly showed up on our doorstep this week carrying a Christmas package for Brennan, of which he’s already ripped part of the paper. Is my lack of enthusiasm for babysitting indicated by the fact that I sadly cannot recall the names of the few children I watched? Poor kids. But blessed is Brennan!

So if someone told me a few years back that I would be head over heals for a little baby, I wouldn’t have believed them. Well, I’d be more offended and hurt, truth be told, because that comment seemed saturated with assumption to me at the time. Assumption that we’d even have kids, that we’d even be able to have children since we were going on two years of trying, and well, that I’d get to a place of enjoying a little whippersnapper.

Eleven months of living with a baby, however, I am different. I will never be the same again. There are still days I think about our previous life before children and the cherished time that was for us as a couple, sometimes missing it. But those days are few in number. And I wouldn’t trade how I’m different, nor the reason I am changed, for anything. Nothing.

Eleven months later, I am ever more smitten with a baby boy, who looks more like a toddler these days than a newborn babe. His choppy hair I whacked is growing out, nearly ready for a trim by someone other than his mother. His smile is as big as ever, his energy level more than what I realized.  He’s learning something new all of the time, including various imitations such as holding objects or his hand up to his ear like he’s answering the phone; peek a boo; or brushing his hair with my brush. He tries to assist with buckling his car seat belts and dressing. There are times when he stands on his own, unassisted, and he walks around furniture, but the interest in walking or taking a few steps towards us seems null right now.  

Fascinated by pictures, he’ll crawl over to pictures of our friends and family and point to them. Still ever the observer, he sizes up his surroundings and the people he’s with before waving ‘hello’ or giving them ‘five’. My most favorite thing in the whole wide world is asking him for a kiss and he’ll lean into my face, sometimes with an open, drool dripping mouth.  His favorite instrument at music class for the moment: the drum.

Always a favorite game of his is “I’m gonna get you”/chase, but a new one that’s recently developed is taking things in and out of boxes/containers. In and out. In and out. I will also find Tupperware containers underneath the Christmas tree, or on a kitchen chair. Or maybe I’ll find an ornament he enjoys (a wooden, European Santa) on the piano. My friend, Corrie, told me that she thought the nine-eleven month age range were some of her most favorite months. I wholeheartedly agree! 

Yes, I am different. I enjoy a baby. A baby! Who woulda thunk it?! Certainly not I. But this whippersnapper I’ve been given is most assuredly a good reason why I’ll never be the same again.

Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. James 1:17 (NASB)